Reading the Fantastic Four comics from the start. One of comicdom’s most popular – and most controversial – creators takes over the series in issue #554.

What can I possibly say about writer Mark Millar? With his indie work in stuff like Wanted, The Kingsman, Nemesis, Super Crooks, and especially Kick-Ass, he built a reputation of being “dudebro” or “edgelord” or other such titles. But it’s always struck me as cynical. The guy seems to enjoy stirring up controversy, to where being “edgelord” is his brand. This of course led to Marvel’s Civil War, where he made it a point to screw with the entire Marvel Universe. On the plus side, his work on The Ultimates, Ultimate X-Men, and The Authority shows his writing to be huge and cinematic. It’s no wonder that Hollywood took notice of his work when making the Marvel movies.

Speaking of cinematic, this issue also brings Bruan Hitch and Paul Neary on board for artwork. They exploded onto the scene with the above-mentioned The Authority, where they pioneered what came to be known as “widescreen comics” with big action and a sense of gigantic scale. They continued this style through the deluxe-sized JLA: Heaven’s Ladder, and then on The Ultimates with Millar, which brought them to Fantastic Four.

We begin in… the Old West! The FF, along with Franklin and Valeria, on a train being pursued by men on horseback firing at them. Reed says they’re heading for a time portal, which take them back to the present, and into Disneyland! There’s a lot of banter in this excuse-for-the-characters-to-use-their-powers-for-a-few-pages thing. Just as the train is about to collide with an oncoming mail train, it goes through the portal and instead crashes into the present. We learn that the plan was for the family to visit Disneyland’s opening day ceremonies in 1955, but things went awry.

There are moving boxes all around, as Johnny announces he’s moving out to a new loft inside NYC’s Flatiron Building. He says he has plans to start his own rock band and to star in a reality show. Sue talks about starting her own super-team to raise money for charity rather than fight supervillains, and Ben and Reed head off to Ben’s old school to do a presentation for some kids. At the school, the female teachers are all attracted to Reed, at least until he bores all the kids rambling on and on about physics. Ben cheers everyone up by showing the Fantasticar off to the kids. One of the teachers, Debbie, takes a liking to Ben rather than Reed, and she says yes when he asks her out.  

At the new Baxter Building, Sue is meeting with her new charity-focused super-team, with She-Hulk and the Wasp. Sue explains it’s a way to help people outside of the FF’s usual end-of-the-world scenarios. A portal opens, and out steps Alyssa Moy. (Who is this again? She’s Reed’s old girlfriend, now a millionaire scientist in her right.) Alyssa is not there to join Sue’s team. Instead, she says she needs to speak to Reed right away. She adds that she’s now married to secretive billionaire Ted Castle. Reed shows up, and says Ted is one of the greatest minds on the planet.

Alyssa says she and Ted are working on something that will affect the entire world. She says she needs Reed’s help, and she promises it’ll only take 24 hours. She and Reed disappear through the portal. It leads to a high-tech base at the North Pole called Portal Prime, home of an organization called the Earth Trust. Reed meets Ted Castle, who explains that the Earth Trust’s work must be kept secret to avoid mass hysteria. Ted says that if there’s a worldwide catastrophe, humanity can be evacuated through the giant portal at Portal prime. Alyssa offers to show Reed the other side of the portal, adding that work on the other side is still unfinished.

They travel through the portal, to see a planet and a moon, both under construction. We see the planet’s surface, but also a skeletal structure underneath. “Welcome to Nu-World, Reed,” Alyssa says. “This is where we’re going when the Earth dies.”

To be continued!

Unstable molecule: Reed has refurbished a bunch of Doombots as the new Baxter Building’s household staff. Sue says she doesn’t know exactly where the Doombots came from.

Fade out: Sue is friendly with Alyssa at first, but then shows some hints of jealousy after Reed runs off with Alyssa. This issue has a few references to her and Reed still working things out after their breakup during Civil War.

Clobberin’ time: Back when Alyssa was a semi-regular part of the cast, there were hints of a romance between her and Ben. Upon seeing her in this issue, Ben remarks, “She’s about ten times hotter than I remembered.”

Flame on: There’s mention of Johnny’s previous career attempt as a Hollywood actor, which he says he’s left behind. Since then, he’s also worked as an NYC firefighter and as the FF’s chief financial officer, neither of which are mentioned here.

Fantastic fifth wheel: She-Hulk says she’s secured permission for Sue’s new team to be named after Miss America. This is not the pageant, but the World War II hero, often described as Marvel’s first female superhero.

Reed tells Alyssa that he dismantled H.E.R.B.I.E. the robot so the refurbished Doombots could use H.E.R.B.I.E.’s solar collectors. Is this the death of H.E.R.B.I.E.?!?

Four and a half/Our gal Val: Franklin and Valeria are here to remind readers that they’re part of the main cast. Franklin falls off the train during the opening scene, but Reed is quick to rescue him.

Trivia time: It’s odd that Johnny says he’s going to live in the Flatiron Building. The Marvel Wiki insists that it’s still the headquarters of Damage Control, even after they were exposed as evil war profiteers during Civil War. Here in the real world, it’s been home to various companies over the years, but the internet is telling me that a new renovation was recently announced to convert the building into condos. Now Johnny can live there in the upcoming MCU movie.

If the Fantastic Four had succeeded in visiting Disneyland’s opening day in 1955, it’s likely they wouldn’t have had a good time. The opening was famously a disaster, with broken-down attractions, unruly crowds, and live TV cameras only adding to the chaos.

Fantastic or frightful? We’ll see how things go, but as far as this issue is concerned, Mark Millar is doing right by Fantastic Four. He seems to have real affection for the characters, and he’s added a lot of deep lore for old-time fans. I know his run on the series will go places, but this issue is nonetheless a great opening.

Next: In with the Nu.

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