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Rereading the Fantastic Four comics from the start. The so-called “middle years” are famous (infamous?) for introducing a bunch of hokey, one-off villains, and that’s the case with issue #95.

We begin with a man on the street taking photos of the FF as they stand on the roof of their building. (Heck of a zoom lens on that camera.) He’s a member of the foreign press corps, and he’s there to shoot a visiting delegation of world leaders. The Baxter Building is located right by the U.N., it seems. This man, however, has a sinister plot brewing, thinking that he has to get the delegates and the FF out of his way before he can enact his plan. The fellow calls himself the Monocle (no, really) and his camera secretly contains a “neutrak ray.”

On the rooftop, Reed, Sue and Ben are gossiping about Johnny. They say that he and Crystal are having troubles. The Inhumans want Crystal to rejoin the Inhumans, but Johnny wants her to stay. The hop in the Fantasticar, with Reed saying that they have to protect the delegates, because one unfortunate incident could trigger World War III. The Monocle uses his camera to zap the Fantasticar, disintegrating it. Reed heroically pilots the falling Fantasticar to the river, so as not to destroy New York. He stretches into a soft round shape to protect him and Sue from the impact on the water.

Ben, meanwhile, had split off his portion of the Fantasticar before the attack. He comes across a collapsing building. He uses his awesome strength to hold the structure in place so the people inside can be safely evacuated. The Monocle watches this, revealing via his thought bubble that his neutrak ray was what wrecked the building. The U.N. delegates arrive, saying they’re here to resolve “the crisis.” The Monocle, still in his thoughts, exposits that he’s going to use this incident to kick off an atomic war. He plans to hide out in an underground bunker, and, after all the bombs have fallen, he’ll come back to the surface and become the world’s new ruler. Villain logic!

There’s a funny bit where Reed and Sue return to the Baxter Building wrapped in big blankets after their dip in the river. Reed insists on finding out what happened to the Fantasticar. Then we catch up with Johnny and Crystal. She says she doesn’t want to leave, but the Inhumans need her. Note that Medusa, who is both her big sister and the queen, is standing right there during this conversation. Medusa says Black Bolt, the Inhumans’ king, has ordered Crystal to come home. On cue, a teleportation/portal thingie opens, and Medusa says it’s time for Crystal to leave. Johnny resists, but Medusa uses her super-hair to throw him around the room. She then wraps Crystal in her hair and takes her through the portal. Just like that, Crystal’s gone.

Reed and Sue enter the room, and Reed says finding the mysterious attacker has to take precedence over pursuing Crystal. Johnny reluctantly agrees, and takes off, flying over the city in the hopes of somehow finding the culprit. The Monocle spots him, and attacks, trashing various buildings and landmarks around the city. Johnny realizes that someone’s just trying to distract him, and he deduces that the U.N. conference is where the real action is.

At the U.N., the delegates are about to discuss the “crisis,” and the Monocle is inside, among all the other reporters. He is about to fire his camera and kill the delegates, which he believes will set off nuclear Armageddon. Then, something destroys his camera, before he can pull the trigger. It’s Reed, holding some weird-looking weapon. He says neutrak rays are nothing new, and that’s he’s been working on them for weeks. This allowed him to invent a “reversal ray,” to negate the Monocle’s camera. The Monocle pulls out another gun, and fires concussion blasts at Reed. The Monocle tries to escape, dodging an invisible Sue and her force fields, and then leaping out the window, with little flying devices on his shoes. Too bad that Johnny is there. Johnny burns off the flying machines, and Ben catches the Monocle to turn him over to police. The issue then ends abruptly, with Reed saying the world has now earned a second chance.

Unstable molecule: Reed guiding the Fantasticar into the river to save lives is a great hero moment for him, as is his confrontation with the Monocle at the U.N.

Fade out: Sue almost catches the Monocle while invisible, but he gets away from her with a Judo move. This was after Reed said to Sue, “Only you can stop him now!”

Clobberin’ time: Many fans have said that Ben holding up the falling building is one of the character’s defining moments. Still others have argued that it’s a metaphor for the character’s struggles, carrying the world on his shoulders. I’m not sure I’d go that far, but it is a great scene.

Flame on: Although broken up over Crystal leaving, Johnny nonetheless is quick to figure out that the Monocle is messing with him. Nice to see him use his brains.

Fantastic fifth wheel: We’re not told why, exactly, Medusa and Black Bolt demand that Crystal return, especially after they (presumably) gave permission for her to stay with the FF in issues 82-83. Crystal says she’ll find a way to return to Johnny, but the breakup still seems pretty final. This storyline will be revisited in issue #99.

Commercial break: I always wondered what these things were — cardboard standees, or something more?

Trivia time: The Marvel Wiki says the Monocle is a German spy, who was hired by someone else to attack the U.N., but that’s not in this issue! In the actual story, it’s his own plan to start a war and then take over the world after the bombs fall. Not cool, Marvel Wiki.

Fantastic or frightful? This Monocle guy is D-list, but the book is smart enough to know he’s D-list. Once the FF figure out what’s going on — and they’re quick to do so — the Monocle doesn’t stand a chance against them. So there’s not a lot of suspense or high stakes in this one, but it’s kind of fun to see the heroes take out a villain who stands no chance against them.

Next week: The duplicators.

****

Want more? Check out my book, CINE HIGH, now available for the Kindle and the free Kindle app.

 Rereading the Fantastic Four comics from the start. Generally speaking, fans divide the first 300 or so issues of FF into three eras, the Lee/Kirby years, the “middle years,” and the John Byrne years. Although Kirby is still with the book with this issue, #94, for me it always represented the beginning of the “middle years,” thanks to the introduction of one of the book’s weirdest, wackiest supporting characters.

The story begins with the FF at home, where Reed and Sue announce that they’ve chosen a name for the baby — Franklin, after Sue’s father. They further reveal that lil’ Franklin’s middle name is Benjamin, after the Thing. Ben gets all teary-eyed after learning this, the big softie.

 We then catch up with the Frightful Four, who are still a team, but still bickering with one another. The Wizard is secretly spying on the FF, saying he wants his revenge on our heroes, while Sandman hesitates about putting the baby in danger. Then Paste Pot Pete, um, I mean the Trapster shows up with Medusa, so the original Frightful Four is back together. (Wait, isn’t Medusa a good guy now?)

Reed announces that he’s found a “child-rearing specialist” to help take care of the baby while the FF are having adventures. They fly the Fantasticar to the Adirondacks, to a big gloomy mansion that Reed tells us is the home of Agatha Harkness. Harkness, Reed says, has a world-famous reputation as a child specialist. We meet Harkness, a creepy old lady with a black cat named Ebony. She says she’s coming out of retirement, because she couldn’t say no to the famous Fantastic Four.

Harkness’s mansion is of course a big scary house with creepy antiques and paintings all over the place. She does the horror movie “I’ll show you to your rooms” thing. While horsing around in his bedroom, Ben finds a hidden door leading to a secret passage, where he’s attacked by the Wizard. Ben is lifted off the ground from one of the Wizard’s anti-grav discs, and then knocked unconscious by an energy blast. The Wizard and Sandman attack Johnny next, dousing his flame with Sandman’s sand. The Trapster’s paste gun seals the only door to Reed and Sue’s room.

The Frightful Four reunite inside the house, and the Wizard announces that now that the FF is trapped, it’s time to dispose of them permanently. That’s when Medusa strikes, attacking the Wizard with her super-powered hair. Turns out she secretly only joined them to protect the FF, if needed. (Fooled you!) It’s a short fight, after the Trapster traps Medusa in the paste.

 It looks like the fighting is over, but Harkness appears at the top of the stairs. Ebony transforms from an ordinary cat into a giant panther. There’s a strange bit where Ebony chases the Wizard out of a window, and as the Wizard flies off into the sky, Ebony’s face fills the entre sky around him. (Magic, I guess?) Sandman tries to attack Harkness, but she transforms him into hard, solid rock. The Trapster runs for it, but a big demonic monster blocks the exit, and Trapster faints with fear.

We turn the page, and the “demonic monster” was really Ben, who didn’t even lay a hand on the Trapster. The sand, anti-grav disc, and paste have all disintegrated. Medusa is freed as well. They find Sandman and Wizard both paralyzed with fear. Reed and Sue are out of their room, and everyone rushes to Harkness’s room, where the baby is. They find everything is OK — the baby is sleeping and Harkness is sitting there, knitting. Ben sees a book in the room titled “Tales of Old Salem,” and he suspects that Harkness is a witch. She voices his suspicion before he can say it, suggesting that she read his mind, so Ben freaks out and runs out of the room, Scooby-Doo style.

Unstable molecule: It’s never mentioned how Reed learned about Harkness or why he decided she should be the baby’s nanny, but everyone goes along with it.

Fade out: Sue insists several times that the baby must be kept somewhere remote and distant, to keep him safe from the FF’s many enemies.

Clobberin’ time: Despite being a teammate to a genius, Ben is the only one who suspects there’s something supernaturally weird going on with Harkness.

Flame on: The villains’ plan is to take out Johnny fast, before he can summon up his flame. I wonder why more baddies don’t try this approach.

Fantastic fifth wheel: Although Crystal stays behind in New York in this issue, Medusa makes sure to ask how Crystal is doing, setting up the next issue.

Four and a half: The famously blonde Franklin has brown hair in this issue. A panel showing the exterior of the Baxter Building shows funky blue energy crackling all around it as the FF discuss Franklin’s future safety. Could this be foreshadowing Franklin’s powers?

Commercial break: Glo-Gloop?

 Trivia time: This is actually not the first time readers learned Franklin’s name. So many readers had written into the letter’s page suggesting the name that Stan Lee more or less unofficially spilled the beans in the letters months earlier. Also, Sandman previously appeared in Hulk #114, where he was turned to glass. A line of dialogue in this issue says the Wizard turned him back to normal.

 Fantastic or Frightful? As a comedic haunted house story, this is an amusing little romp, but the fact that so much stuff happens for no reason shows us that we’ve entered the directionless, meandering storylines of the “middle years.”

Next: They call him “One-eye.”

****

Want more? Check out my book, CINE HIGH, now available for the Kindle and the free Kindle app.

Re-reading the Fantastic Four comics from the start. Here’s issue #93, which came out in December 1969. It’s the end of the 1960s, and it’s the unofficial end of Jack Kirby’s time on the FF. Sure, he’ll be around for a few more issues, but most experts agree that this arc was the last time he gave a damn. Anyway, to recap: Skrulls who live as old-timey gangsters kidnapped Ben and are forcing him to fight in gladiatorial games.

We begin in space, where the FF is flying along in their Skrull flying saucer which they happen to own, searching for a trail to lead to Ben. Johnny, it’s worth noting, is flying outside of the ship with his flame burning, with absolutely no mention of how he can do this in the vacuum of space. (Remember that way back in issue #6, Ben and Namor needed special helmets to breathe in space.) Our heroes find a radioactive trail which Reed deduces leads to Ben’s abductors.

On the Skrull planet, Ben and his opponent, the robotic Torgo (not the Manos Torgo, sadly) are finally put into the ring. They’re told they must fight to the death. Ben continues to try to convince Torgo to escape, but Torgo is resigned to his fate. He punches Ben real good. Ben’s strength, however, stands up to Torgo’s blows, and Torgo says Ben is the mightiest opponent he’s ever faced. The Skrulls insist that they keep fighting or else their homeworlds will be destroyed by sonic rays. Then there’s a bit of business where somebody throws a bomb into the ring, which knocks Ben back. Torgo is about to strike the final blow, but the Skrulls won’t have it, saying Ben was defeated by the bomb, not by Torgo.

While the aliens/gangsters argue about the rules, Ben finally fights back, punching Torgo. The computer, which I guess is keeping score somehow, determines that the fight’s outcome is voided. Now, they have to start the fight over. (How that’s different from just keeping on fighting, I don’t know.)

The FF arrives at the Skrull planet, and a Skrull ship flies out to intercept them. Johnny envelops the alien’s ship in a “sub-nova heat blanket.” This knocks out the Skrull. As the FF invade his ship, Reed says they’ll learn where Ben is once he comes to.

Torgo and Ben have been given some weird-looking alien weapons that kind of look like big bottle openers, and they continue to fight. Despite all that’s happened, Ben is still arguing that they should work together to escape, but Torgo still believes that they have no choice but to keep on fighting. Ben refuses to go the distance and kill Torgo. Torgo then reveals that the weapons are also gas guns (!) and he blasts Ben with knockout gas. This makes Ben vulnerable to Torgo’s final blow. In the stands, the Skrulls/gangsters once again argue whether these weapons are allowed in the rules (they really should have gone over these rules before the fight started).

Elsewhere, one of the gangsters’ henchmen is reported about the fight on the phone, when he’s approached by Reed, now in a full-on gangster outfit. He says he’s with “Reed Richards’ gang” and he demands to be taken to the fight. They hop in a car, where Johnny and Crystal are also in their best Untouchables-era finery. Lest we forget that this is an alien gangster planet, it’s a flying car.

At the arena, Ben’s message finally sinks in, and Torgo says he cannot kill one who has shown him mercy. The Skrulls prepare to fire up the sonic disrupter, but a blast of energy comes out of nowhere and destroys it. The blast came from Crystal, arriving in the nick of time with Reed and Johnny. Ben is so happy to see his friends that he does the old “I must have got something in my eye” gag.

No time for sentiment for Torgo, however, as he frees all the slaves, and they all bring the fight to their Skrull overlords. The FF escape in the commotion, and flee the planet. Ben wonders who Torgo was, and hopes his former cellmate will succeed in the fight for freedom.

Unstable molecule: Note that Reed’s gangster suit isn’t made of unstable molecules. When he stretches his arm, the suit doesn’t stretch with it. Nice detail, there.

Clobberin’ time: Although he’s the one so often quick to fight, Ben’s underlying humanity is the showcase in this issue, as the real fight isn’t in the gladiator ring — it’s the fight to become a better man.

Flame on: Still not sure how Johnny can fly around in space like that. Not even one line of dialogue explaining that he’s protected by a portable energy field or some crap?

Fantastic fifth wheel: Crystal is totally badass when she destroys the sonic world-killing machine.

Commercial break: If you know your comics history, you know about the controversies surrounding these light tables, yet here’s an ad for one — in a comic!

Trivia time: According to the Marvel Wiki, the Skrull gangsters Boss Barker and Lippy Louie were never seen again after this arc, and are presumed dead after the revolution in this issue. If anyone from Marvel is reading this, I dare you to bring these two back.

Fantastic or frightful? If all the rumors are true and this was Jack Kirby’s last genuine work on the FF, then it’s a good one for him to go out on. Many have speculated that the Thing’s personality was basically Kirby’s personality, and here we get to the heart of what Ben is all about. But it’s not over! Kirby is still with us for the next few issues, and there’ll be more to talk about.

 Next week: Season of the witch.

****

Want more? Check out my book, CINE HIGH, now available for the Kindle and the free Kindle app.