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Re-reading the Fantastic Four comics from the start. Last issue, the FF bought a new house, but they didn’t do a title check, which would have revealed the place is still owned by the Mole Man. He attacked, zapping our heroes and making them all blind! That’s where issue #89 picks up.

We begin in a very cinematic fashion, with the first few pages of the issue depicting the “camera” a.k.a. the reader’s point of view, floating through the woods, then into the mysterious house, and then catching up to the FF in the middle of the fight with the Mole Man. Ben is here with the team, even though the previous issue made a point of telling of us that he had stayed behind. Anybody got a No-Prize for this one? The FF try to fight back, but because they’re blind, the Mole Man kicks their butts big time.

Then, somewhat randomly, we cut to outer space, for another trippy Kirby photo-page. An alien spacecraft observes an Earth rocket en route to the moon, but the aliens dismiss this historic event as Earthlings playing with toys. Then comes the reveal — it’s the Skrulls! More specifically, it’s a Skrull who calls himself “The Slaver.” He says that even though Earth is off-limits to Skrulls, he’s breaking those rules in the hopes of finding and capturing one very important human.

Back to the mystery house. The Mole Man knocks Johnny unconscious, and then repeats his plan of bombarding the Earth with rays that will render all humanity sightless. With his army of single-minded subterraneans (still not called “Moloids”) at his disposal, the Mole Man says his conquest of the entire world will be simple. Sue tries to even the odds by turning invisible, but the Mole Man’s staff has sensors which can spot her. She uses her force fields to knock him around, and Reed surmises that the Mole Man’s glasses are his weakness. It takes some doing, but Reed and Sue manage to get the glasses off. The Mole Man’s sensitive eyes are overcome with the brightness in the room. It comes with a price, as Reed is zapped by the Mole Man’s staff, which M.M. says is fatal to the touch.

Sue flips out, attacking the Mole Man, as he has a total guilt trip, saying “I’m never to blame! Never! Never!” The staff is destroyed, which restores everyone’s sight. (Science?) There’s an incredibly badass splash page of Johnny flying to attack the Mole Man, before the Mole Man can summon his subterraneans. Defeated, the Mole Man collapses, reciting his origin, how mankind drove him underground as an outcast. Johnny sees through the B.S., saying that the Mole Man chose to go underground, and that no one forced him. Meanwhile, Ben performs artificial respiration on Reed, bringing him back to life. Sorry, slash-ficcers, but we don’t actually get to see their lips touch. Ben has a great moment when he reveals that for as much crap as he gives Reed, he thinks Reed is “the greatest.”

Reed comes back to life, and our heroes are a family again. Elsewhere, the Slaver’s ship lands, and we have a cliffhanger.

Unstable molecule: Reed sacrifices himself to save the team, grabbing the Mole Man’s dangerous staff, and keeping it pointed at the wall the whole time it was zapping him, so that no one but him was harmed.

Fade out: Here we see hints of the era in which Sue became the team’s most powerful member. She thinks of new ways to use her powers, she outsmarts the baddie, and she stands up for her family.

Clobberin’ time: So, where did Ben learn artificial respiration? In his days in the air force? In his years as a wrestler? And will this ever come up again?

Flame on: Johnny’s the one who takes the Mole Man down in the end. Even though Johnny’s a good-looking blonde guy, he shows great empathy for Ben, who is a monster, and Alicia, who is blind, saying they’ve made good with their lives while the Mole Man went and hid underground.

Fantastic fifth wheel: Crystal uses only “half power” when attacking the Mole Man, in case her elemental blasts accidentally misfire and harm her teammates.

Commercial break: Another classic, sneezing powder! What do you suppose was actually in this stuff?

Trivia time: The reference to moon rockets is timely, as this issue came out in August 1969, and the actual moon landing occurred in September 1969.

Fantastic or frightful? I’m torn on this one. On one hand, the crisis really gets to the heart of who these characters are and why they’re so great. They’re a family, and they’re willing to sacrifice everything to save one another, even if they might have been bickering a few minutes earlier. On the other hand, the Mole Man isn’t much of a threat, defeated awfully easily. The high drama doesn’t match the relatively low stakes.

Next: Slavery sucks.

****

Want more? Check out my book, CINE HIGH, now available for the Kindle and the free Kindle app.

Rereading the Fantastic Four comics from the start. While our heroes were in Latveria during the last few issues, we had this subplot about a mysterious house that’s really just a metal hatch out in the woods that people say is haunted. In issue #88, we finally learn what that’s about.

The FF are back home, checking in with Alicia, who’s been taking care of the baby. There’s some fun “family” shtick as everyone’s happy to see each other again and we learn Reed and Sue still haven’t chosen a name for the baby. Ben and Johnny exposit about Reed and Sue looking for a house outside the city as a way of keeping the baby away from harm. We then cut to the house in question, or at least the area around it, where a blinded man stumbles into traffic. He says a light dazzled him out in the woods, and that others have seen it as well.

The FF fly out to the mystery house, with Sue further saying its remote location will protect them from celebrity hunters. The door automatically opens in their presence, with a ramp leading downward. Johnny tests out the roof, and learns that it is fireproof. (What if it wasn’t, Johnny?) Inside, the house is all trippy, with twisted walls made of some kind of futuristic plastic. A strange humming sound gives everyone a headache. A couple of panels show us that the entire house is a cylinder, able to be lowered deep into the ground. But it doesn’t go underground at this time, I guess, because the next scene is Ben at the eye doctor (!) still complaining of his headache.

On the roof of the Baxter Building, some moving men are taking a break, based on union rules. Ben, not in any union, uses his awesome strength to move the boxes. At the mystery house, Reed and Sue are moving in. Reed tries to cut into one wall for some more space, but the wall is made of vibranium, and alarms go off. A bunch of death traps are activated, which Reed escapes from. While Reed investigates, Johnny and Crystal arrive with more of their stuff from the Baxter Building.

Deep underground, a man states that the FF are in danger of interfering with his plan by messing with the house. He rides an elevator up to the surface, and it’s… the Mole Man! He says his plan is to send out the light rays all over the Earth, blinding all of humanity. He also has “ultra sonic rays” which he says will “spell disaster” to his victims.

The FF, except for Ben, who’s with Alicia, enjoy a meal in their new home, with Crystal serving “hot buns.” (Wha-hey!) But then the strange humming starts again, and Reed, Sue, Johnny, and Crystal all go blind. While the stumble about in sightlessness, the Mole Man steps out from hiding and declares, “I am master of this house!”

To be continued!

Unstable molecule: To escape a death trap, Reed stretches himself to a paper-thin state so he can squeeze out from under a glass cage

Fade out: Even after learning her new house has automated death traps, Sue is still adamant that it’s home, inviting Johnny and Crystal over for dinner.

Clobberin’ time: It’s comic relief for Ben, as he jokes around while visiting the eye doctor and then showing the lazy union guys what’s what.

Flame on: Johnny’s overseeing the move shows him in a leadership role, but earlier Reed has to caution him not to use his fire so close to the baby.

Trivia time: The last time we saw the Mole Man was in Uncanny X-Men #38, which ended when he got amnesia. It’s never been revealed how he recovered from that or how he reclaimed control of his underground kingdom.

Commercial break: Still too young to shave, kids? Send away for phony facial hair!

Fantastic or frightful? The art is great, and it’s always fun to see the FF doing ordinary, everyday stuff, but these positives don’t outweigh the negatives. The big plot hole is that everyone knows there’s something dangerous about this house, they even say as much, but Reed and Sue move in anyway, just to set up the cliffhanger. It’s out of character and it makes the heroes look foolish.

Next: Walkin’ in darkness.

****

Want more? Check out my book, CINE HIGH, now available for the Kindle and the free Kindle app.

Rereading the Fantastic Four comics from the start. Just what does it mean to be Dr. Doom? What goes on inside that armored head of his? Delve deep into the psyche of evil in issue #87. 

After a quick recap of the previous issue, which reminds us that the FF have their powers back but are still trapped in Latveria, and all the Latverians managed to escape the big explosion safely. Ben decides to take the offensive by tossing a piece of wreckage at Doom’s castle. This maybe wasn’t so smart, because now everyone inside knows the FF have survived.

 We then cut to inside, where Doom’s toady Hauptmann is talking to the artist, the one who was painting Doom’s portrait earlier. The artist says Hauptmann is the true evil, because he revels in Doom’s tyranny rather than be afraid of it. Hauptmann has the artist locked up and reports to Doom, who says he’s already aware the FF are alive. He says the guards are only to offer “token resistance,” because he wants Reed to enter this room. It’s Doom’s piano room, and he’s written a special concerto to play for Reed, on a special piano that uses “hyper-sound.”

Outside the castle, Sue and Crystal fall through a trap door, drawn downward by a “cushion of air.” (As opposed to… gravity?) Then there are a few pages of Reed, Ben and Johnny fighting the castle’s outer defenses, including a high-tech turret gun. Similarly, Sue and Crystal end up in a glass-walled prison, which Crystal easily shatters with her powers, represented here by yellow lasers coming out of her hands. Sue and Crystal then spend a couple of pages fighting their way through Doom’s guards before confronting Doom. Except it’s not a battle. Doom has prepared a fine meal for his “guests,” and he does a great villain speech about how they are indeed his guests, and the evening’s festivities will decide the fates of them all.

Remember that subplot from a few issues back about the mysterious underground house with the metal hatch opening? We’re back to that for a few panels, when a bunch of kids go nosing around the house and get scared off by a spooky noise. Where’s the Scooby Gang when you need them?

In Latveria, Reed, Ben and Johnny fight their way through wave after wave Doom’s guards, making their way inside the castle. Inside, Sue and Crystal actually sit down at the table and enjoy the meal. (Free food always tastes better, I guess?) Doom tries to play the “I’m really a nice guy” card, by saying that Latveria is a peaceful nation, and that mankind has no reason to fear him because he already has anything he could ever want. He sits at the piano, bragging about his world-class art collection. Speaking of which, that’s where Ben, Reed, and Johnny find themselves, in the art room. Reed suspects that Doom got the art by looting museums. (Harsh, Reed.)

In one corner of the room, we catch up with Hauptmann and the artist. Hauptmann is now decked out with a flamethrower, saying he has discovered the artist is really an undercover S.H.I.E.L.D. agent. The artist pleads for him not to attack, because the fire would destroy all the artwork, but Hauptmann doesn’t care. “What do I care for art?” he says. “Think of how I will be rewarded!” Reed approaches Hauptmann, who blasts the fire right onto Reed’s chest. Reed doesn’t so much as even say “Ow,” and instead tells the artist to take cover and orders Ben and Johnny to find Sue and Crystal.

 Doom is still sitting at the piano, which conveniently has a little TV screen showing him what’s happening. He does not approve, saying, “What are a few vulnerable lives compared to the immortal art that might be destroyed? It must not happen! It will not happen!” He plays the piano, which sends its deadly sonic waves directly at Hauptmann. Hauptmann drops dead (!) right in front of Reed. (This is often referred to as the first time Dr. Doom ever actually murdered someone. Has anyone done the research and know whether that’s true?)

 With that, Doom decides to let the FF go, giving them free passage out of Latveria. Crystal still doesn’t trust him, but he insists that he is many things, but not a liar. After all that business earlier in the arc about trapping the FF in Latveria, why does he let them go? The only spoken reason is one line, “I am weary of this game,” but perhaps Doom subconsciously knows he’s been beaten. His green Doombots are destroyed and the FF invaded his castle. On the other hand, this whole arc has had Doom declaring that he’s already won, and that he’s so sure of himself and the rightness of every action, that it doesn’t matter to him what the FF does. In his mind, he’s so much better than them, that he doesn’t care what they do, Doombots or no. Still, the issue’s final panel has Doom promising to fight again another day, so our heroes are somewhere on that dark mind of his.

Unstable molecule: Reed is so badass that he takes a blast from a flamethrower to the chest, and it doesn’t even faze him. I suppose it’s likely that the FF uniforms are fireproof with Johnny flying around all the time, but still, not even an “Ouch” or a “Watch where you’re point that thing.” Earlier, he squeezes through a keyhole as part of the assault on Doom’s castle.

Fade out: Sue handles Doom’s deathtraps with ease, and manages to disarm a Doombot while invisible.

Clobberin’ time: Ben is definitely the muscle in this issue, bombarding Doom’s forces by throwing huge objects at them.

Flame on: The Doombots have an air-gun on a turret, specifically designed to take out Johnny’s flames, but he avoids their attacks long enough for Reed and Ben to take down the Doombots from the inside.

Fantastic fifth wheel: Crystal doesn’t put up with any crap from Doom. As part of a royal family herself, she’s not impressed with his regal nature.

Commercial break: These Lee Jeans ads were a comic-within-the-comic starring boy hero Jim Driscoll. Anybody else think they’re just a little too butt-centric?

Trivia time: Many people have compared the Doom dinner scene to a similar scene in The Empire Strikes Back, in which Darth Vader reveals his presence at a fancy dinner table. Doom killing Hauptmann in this issue is also similar to Vader choking his underlings with the Force. Both George Lucas and Stan Lee have been playfully evasive in interviews over the years as to whether Vader was inspired/influenced by Dr. Doom.

Ben complains that Doom’s art room doesn’t have a single pin-up or Raquel Welch. Do I really need to tell you she is? An actress and model, Welch was one of the biggest sex symbols of the late ‘60s and early ‘70s, with posters of her adorning many teenage boys’ rooms (and Ben’s too, apparently).

Fantastic or frightful? People say Jack Kirby had one foot out the door by this time, but, after re-reading this issue, I just don’t see it. His work is stellar, and the fact that this issue combines action, with the guys’ storming Doom’s castle, and character development, with an emphasis on who Doom is and what makes him tick, makes this one of the best Fantastic Four comics ever made. Yes, you could nit-pick it to death, but it’s nonetheless a historically important issue, one that opens the door for more sophisticated art and storytelling that we’d ever seen in the Silver Age. In short, it’s a true classic.

Next: House hunting!

****

Want more? Check out my book, CINE HIGH, now available for the Kindle and the free Kindle app.