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Reading the Fantastic Four comics from the start. This is vol. 2 #1, finding us still in the middle of Heroes Reborn, in which superstar artist Jim Lee continues retelling the FF’s early days in his own blockbuster visual style. We’ve had Dr. Doom, Black Panther, Sub-Mariner, and the Mole Man, so next on Jim Lee’s greatest hits list is the Inhumans.

The issue begins with Sue having a vision of a little boy, who we the readers know is Franklin. Sue is frightened of her increasing awareness of having lived another life in another timeline. Cut to later, where Sue, Ben, and Johnny are in Reed’s lab, doing the Danger Room thing as a classic excuse-for-the-characters-to-use-their-powers-for-a-few-issues thing. It also serves to teach Johnny and Ben about teamwork, as they can only outsmart their tests by working together. Ben and Johnny joke about Sue treating them like kids, and they call her a “mother hen.” This further upsets her.

Cut to the New York Museum of Natural History, where Reed and Tony Stark attending a gala to celebrate a new archeology exhibit featuring historic relics recently discovered in Tibet. The rest of the FF arrive, just in time for a presentation of an ancient tablet that appears to be evidence of a lost civilization predating humans. The tablet has strange writing on it, which Reed recognizes as the same strange writing he saw in the Mole Man’s caverns from Vol. 2 #2. Reed deduces that the tablet is somehow linked to the mysterious stellar anomaly that gave the FF their powers.

Johnny flirts with a sexy redhead named Frankie, only to learn that she’s Tony Stark’s date. Feeling rejected, Johnny leaves the gala alone. Then a woman in green body armor attacks the museum, zapping Ben with a psionic blast and stealing the tablet. On a nearby rooftop, the woman sends a message to others, saying the secret of the Great Refuge is safe. She spoke to soon, though, as she is attacked and subdued by Johnny. She reveals her name is Crystal, just another of her kind, Gorgon, attacks.

Gorgon (who, let’s not forget, once defeated the Fantastic Four singlehandedly) and Karnak are here, but they’ve been redesigned considerably, wearing edgy ‘90s “street clothes.” Gorgon and Crystal argue about Crystal’s actions, allowing time for the rest of the FF to arrive. Karnak summons giant teleporting dog Lockjaw for a quick escape. Lockjaw not only teleports Crystal, Gorgon, and Karnak away, but they take Johnny with them.

Later, Reed, Sue, and Johnny are in the FF’s jet. Reed has formed a plan, hoping to find Johnny by returning to the spot in Tibet where the tablet was found. Upon approaching the Himalayas, the jet enters a dampening field, shutting down all its systems. Ben manages to bring the crashing ship down for a landing in the snow. A group of shadowy figures watches the FF from a distance. One of them is revealed to be Black Bolt, and the others ask what should be done with the three strangers. Reed, Sue, and even Ben collapse in the snow, and we finally get the reveal of the Inhumans – Black Bolt, Medusa, Gordon, Karnak, and Triton. Medusa says Black Bolt will spare their lives… for now.

Unstable molecule: This issue reminds us that Reed and Tony Stark are former college buddies in the Heroes Reborn universe, with them cracking jokes about the good old days.

Fade out: Sue is one running the Danger Room program instead of Reed, and she dons a weird-looking VR helmet to do it. This might seem like an unnecessary detail, but it shows her taking an active role in the team’s leadership.

Clobberin’ time: Ben debuts a somewhat ridiculous new belt in this issue, one with number 4s going around his waist. Then, in the Himalayas, Ben has a good ol’ Image Comics-style belt that’s lined with a bunch of tiny pouches. It’s just not a ‘90s superhero comic without lots of tiny pouches!

Flame on: After all that talk about teamwork, there’s one panel where Johnny uses his powers to light Ben’s cigar for him, which was a nice touch.

Fantastic fifth wheel: Crystal is back, and note that this is the Crystal of the Marvel Universe, and not a construct of the Heroes Reborn universe. Her memories have been rewired, just like the FF and the Avengers. The rest of the Inhuman Royal family, though, are Heroes Reborn constructs.

Although it was never made officials, the woman Frankie is generally agreed to be the Heroes Reborn version of Frankie Raye, Johnny’s ex-girlfriend and former FF alternate team member.

Four and a half: Franklin’s cameo in this issue again sets up the sooner-rather-than-later ending of Heroes Reborn, in which all this will be revealed to be a world of Franklin’s own making.

Commercial break: “How can we market this comic to new readers?” “Why not a little girl and a bird?”

Trivia time: The American Museum of Natural History, located in the real world at 79th Street and Central Park West, is a favorite battling grounds for a lot of Marvel heroes and villains. Spider-Man’s enemy Stegron has a particular interest in the museum, enacting multiple plots there. Spidey also fought Kraven and Calypso in the museum. At another time, Hawkeye, Mockingbird brought Old West character the Phantom Rider back to the present there. And when Marvel had the Godzilla license, our own Fantastic Four duked out with the big G on the museum grounds.

Fantastic or frightful? Heroes Reborn continues to be more remake rather than reboot, with much of this feeling familiar to what came before, and not a lot new to say.

Next: “There they are, Albert. Faces of stone.”

****

Want more? Check out my book, CINE HIGH, now available for the Kindle and the free Kindle app.

Reading the Fantastic Four comics from the start. We’re officially halfway through Heroes Reborn with issue #7 (a.k.a. Vol. 2 Issue 7). I suspect the writing was on the wall by now that Heroes Reborn wasn’t working out, hence the sales-friendly Wolverine cover.

The issue begins with Ben in the hospital, following his guest spot in Heroes Reborn: Iron Man #6, in which he destroyed a gamma core to save New York, severely burning his hands in the process. Johnny jokes with Ben, pretending to give him a “Game Master” handheld videogame as a gift, which Ben can’t use because his hands are bandaged. But then Johnny does something genuinely nice, giving Ben the real gift of an authentic Cuban cigar. Then Alicia shows up, forgiving Ben for missing their date, what with all that Dr. Doom stuff happening. Ben says he’s glad they finally have some time to spend together.

On the way back to HQ, Reed receives an alert, saying his latest experiment is nearing on completion. Reed says he’s investigating a possible link between the recent appearance of the Silver Surfer and the mysterious space anomaly that gave the FF their powers. (Keep in mind that Heroes Reborn is an alternate reality, so this is re-imagined version of our heroes’ origins). Theorizing that the FF’s powers originate in “another plane of existence,” or a “parallel world,” he had built a portal to another dimension he names the Negative Zone.

Reed, Sue, and Johnny don somewhat ridiculous-looking spacesuits for the journey into the Negative Zone. The board their ship, which I believe is merely this series’ version of the Fantasticar, and take off through the portal. After flying through the trippy-looking distortion area, they come across Blastaar the Living Bomb-burst, who’s just hanging out on a nearby asteroid, apparently. Blastaar easily destroys the Fantasticar. Just before he and the FF can fight, the Watcher appears, saying Blastaar’s senseless attack has made it necessary for him to intervene.

Then things get really weird. Reed finds himself transported elsewhere, only see Wolverine attacking an alternate universe version of Reed. Except that there’s no X-Men or mutants in Heroes Reborn, so Reed has no idea who Wolvie is. He then sees alternate versions of Ben and Johnny, as well as who we readers recognize as She-Hulk, Storm, and Rogue. Reed checks his “chronolog,” and deduces that he’s watching images from the past. Reed ponders how he has existed in two realities at once.

Then it’s Johnny’s turn, who has a vision of himself marrying Alicia instead of Ben. Sue’s vision is next, and is the most disturbing. She sees Franklin and his nanny Agatha Harkness. Sue instinctively suspects that Franklin is her long-lost son. Franklin runs past Sue and into his real mom, the Sue of another dimension. Then the Watcher reappears, introducing himself to the FF.

The Watcher says, “I have merely revealed to you a world that all of you already knows exists.” He says it’s up to the FF to restore this other world, and that the consequences could have a profound impact through the entire universe. The Watcher then teleports the heroes back to the Baxter Building, as if everything they just experienced never happened at all. Sue, however, is heartbroken after seeing a son she never knew.

Cut to outer space, where the Silver Surfer reunites with Galactus. The Surfer says that Earth is different from all other planets Galactus has harvested. He asks for further investigation. Galactus refuses, however, saying his hunger is too great. A disappointed Surfer can only say, “Very well, master.” On the last page, the Watcher speaks directly to the reader, saying he always watched and never interfered… until now.

To be continued!

Unstable molecule: Reed’s vision is a scene from the Fantastic Four vs. X-Men miniseries. Wolverine refers to Kitty Pryde, whom Reed was trying to help at that time. It’s not clear why this moment was chosen for Reed to relive out of all his memories, except that Wolverine sells comics.

Fade out: The Marvel Wiki approximates Sue’s vision taking place sometime after Fantastic Four annual #18. The FF spend that whole annual in space without Franklin, so I’m not clear why that comic in particular is singled out, but anything goes when you’re having an interdimensional time vision.

Clobberin’ time: Ben’s cigar is a relic of the past. Marvel’s ban on smoking started in 1990 when the company banned images of smoking in trading cards, and then in 2001 the company announced that characters would no longer smoke in the comics, with Wolverine, the Thing, Nick Fury, and Gambit being singled out by name. Later, in 2015, Disney executive Bob Iger announced that smoking would no longer appear in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

Flame on: Johnny’s vision is of course from the wedding issue back in issue #300. That means the Alicia of the vision is really Lyja the Skrull in disguise, but this issue doesn’t seem interested in referencing that.

Fantastic fifth wheel: There’s no She-Hulk in Heroes Reborn, and yet Reed has no reaction to seeing her in her FF uniform. That Wolverine guy really does hog all the attention.

Four and a half: It’s possible that Franklin seen in Sue’s vision might be Franklin of the regular Marvel Universe, who created the Heroes Reborn universe with his reality bending powers. He runs right towards one Sue before going to the other, though, so you never know.

Commercial break: “She pressing charges? I get that a lot.”

Trivia time: Also in Heroes Reborn: Iron Man #6, an image of Onslaught appeared just as the heroes save the day, further confirming that Marvel was ready to wrap up Heroes Reborn a mere six months after it began.

Fantastic or frightful? The issue starts out promisingly, with a lot of great character work in the hospital scenes, and then a jaunt into the Negative Zone. But then it dawns on the reader that it’s all just an excuse for artist Jim Lee to draw Wolverine for a few pages in the hopes of upping sales. The two pages of Galactus and the Silver Surfer are the only real plot in the issue.

Next: Let’s everybody get Inhuman.

****

Want more? Check out my book, CINE HIGH, now available for the Kindle and the free Kindle app.

Reading the Fantastic Four comics from the start. This is vol. 2 issue 6, continuing Heroes Reborn, in which superstar artist Jim Lee attempted modernize the FF for all the cool ‘90s kids.

We begin in NYC, where Alicia is concerned about Ben when he doesn’t show up for their date. She wonders if he’s in danger, and/or if he’s out saving the world. Then we get back to the main plot inside Castle Doom in Latveria. S.H.I.E.L.D. Agent Wyatt Wingfoot, who’s been secretly conspiring with Dr. Doom, is revealed to be a Super-Skrull, here to steal the Silver Surfer’s power cosmic. The FF, the real Wyatt, and their new pal Black Panther compare notes, saying that Silver Surfer came from the same mysterious space anomaly that gave the FF their powers. Doom and Super-Skrull fight, and Black Panther says the heroes must choose between the lesser of two evils.

Wyatt says the key to stopping the Super-Skrull is to transfer the power cosmic from him back into the Silver Surfer. The Skrull short-circuits Doom’s armor and says his goal is revenge against the Surfer, who he describes as the enemy of all Skrulls. He further explains that Silver Surfer is the herald of Galactus, giving us the first look at Galactus in Heroes Reborn, along with a one-page description of who Galactus is, and that using the Surfer’s power against Galactus is the Skrulls’ “final reckoning.”

The two S.H.I.E.L.D. agents who arrived with fake Wyatt are revealed to also be Skrulls, and they announce that an extraction team is flying toward Castle Doom. The Super-Skrull easily destroys the ships. Ben and Johnny attack the Super-Skrull, who reveals he can mimic the FF’s powers, and he takes them both out. Black Panther continues to work on rejuvenating the Silver Surfer. Doom comes to and says only he has the reversion code to do so, and that makes him in charge.

Black Panther fights the Super-Skrull next, but this is a diversion. When the Super-Skrull attacks, Sue uses a force field to direct his energy blast away from Black Panther and back into Silver Surfer, just in time to Doom and Reed to do science and complete the process. The Silver Surfer is revived, and now he fights the Super-Skrull, who still has some Power Cosmic left in him. The Skrull says he knows the Surfer is really Norrin Radd, but the Surfer says Norrin Radd no longer exists.

The battle gets so out of control that it threatens to breach the fusion core underneath Castle Doom. Doom stays behind to repair the core while the FF, Black Panther and Wyatt make a run for it. The castle is saved, even though there wasn’t time for Doom to save the reactor. Reed suspects that are other forces at work. Back aboard the FF’s ship, Ben says the Latverian Air Force is on its way, so the heroes take off. As they do, the Silver Surfer watches them from a distance. The caption states that he’s the one who sealed the fusion core, because the humans are the first creatures throughout the galaxy who have ever shown him… compassion.

Then there’s a backup story, “Industrial Revolution Prologue,” in which we see Doom has survived. He’s monitoring the events of Heroes Reborn: Avengers #4 and 5, which introduced the Hulk. He’s then shocked to learn that the Hulk is none other than one of his old college buddies, Bruce Banner. He says he will monitor the situation, so that no matter who wins the upcoming conflict, he was stand tall among the wreckage.

Unstable molecule: Some great Reed Richards technobabble this time, when he says, “Now we have to hope that the flux inhibitor was able to stabilize the distillation process within acceptable energy levels!”

Fade out: Sue also gets in on the science-speak at the start of the issue, describing Doom’s plan to steal the power cosmic. This reminds readers that in this timeline, she’s also a big brain alongside Reed.

Clobberin’ time: Ben has something of a code of honor, in which he chides the Super-Skrull for taking out the extraction ships from a distance. Ben says it’s more honorable to fight up close, where you see your opponent eye-to-eye.

Flame on: The Super-Skrull calls Johnny “pup” multiple times throughout this issue, reinforcing that Johnny is the young, upstart member of the team.

Commercial break: Massive. Chiseled. RIPPED.

Trivia time: Alicia speaks on the phone to a friend named Cass. No idea who this character might be, as the Marvel Wiki lists a whole bunch of Cassandras running around. One Cassandra, interestingly, was the wife of Nathaniel Richards, who became the villainous Warlord of Other Earth from back in issue #272. Since Heroes Reborn is an alternate timeline tied into Franklin Richards, wouldn’t that be interesting to have Warlord Cassandra lurking in the background?

Fantastic or frightful? It’s an all-they-do-is-fight issue, but I’d say it works, because the Super-Skrull so outpowers our heroes, that nothing they throw at him works. It keeps you guessing throughout the fight. Jim Lee’s art continues to impress, in that old school ‘90s Image Comics way.

Next: Canon fodder.

****

Want more? Check out my book, CINE HIGH, now available for the Kindle and the free Kindle app.

Hey, this blog is back! We had some technical difficulties for a while there, which have hopefully been worked out by now. To celebrate the return of Fantastic Friday, we’re going back to 1982 for Fred Hembeck and The Fantastic Four Roast!

The Fantastic Four Roast is the brainchild of Marvel’s then-EIC Jim Shooter and fan cartoonist Fred Hembeck. Fred Hembeck rose to fame by self-publishing his own superhero parody comics, which became so popular Marvel went ahead and hired him to draw his parodies for them. Hembeck remains beloved to comic fans to this day, evidenced by a recently-published Fred Hembeck Omnibus hardcover. So when he shows up as “host” of the roast, ‘80s readers knew what they were in for.

On the comic’s inside front cover, Hembeck introduces readers to the concept of a roast, a half-party, half-standup comedy show, where a celebrity guest of honor receives playful jibes from his fellow celebrity friends. Yes, Hembeck references the classic-and-possibly-dated Dean Martin roasts that were this comic’s inspiration.

The story begins, and rather than full-on parody from the start, we’re squarely in the Marvel Universe continuity of 1982, with FF in the Baxter Building and in their uniforms/hairstyles at that time. Reed, Sue, Ben and Johnny are getting ready for a party, which they believe will be a “Fantastic Four Toast.” Ben and Johnny start bickering, leading to a classic excuse-for-the-characters-to-use-their-powers-for-a-few-pages intro. As this happens, a mysterious figure watches our heroes from the shadows, plotting their doom.

Cut to the Plaza Hotel, where J. Jonah Jameson is now a TV newsman, introducing the night’s festivities, where the Avengers, the Defenders, the X-Men, the Inhumans, and even the Legion of Monsters show up to pay tribute to the Fantastic Four. The FF enter the hotel to learn that this is a roast, not a toast. All the Marvel heroes are sitting around dinner tables inside. Fred Hembeck himself plays MC, and the FF take the seats of honor.

We get the first round of superheroes doing standup, which is what this comic is known for. First up is Spider-Man, who drops down from the and ceiling exchanges banter with Johnny. He’s replaced by Sandman, who introduces the fact that all the villains are present as well as the heroes. Sandman jokes about his time with the Frightful Four, pointing out that Medusa left their team, only for Medusa to drag him off the stage with her super-hair.

Then we get back to the plot. As everyone is served the first of their four-course meal, the mystery villain places an object in a bowl of soup. Johnny gets the bowl and finds a tiny bomb in it. With Reed’s suggestion, Johnny flames on and harmlessly burns up the bomb inside his mouth.

Then more standup as Captain America and Reed remind everyone that they’re both World War II vets, despite not having aged all that much. Next is Iron Man, who flirts with Sue, and then Namor the Sub-Mariner, who REALLY flirts with Sue. Then what might be the best bit in the comic, the Hulk takes the stage and tells some pathetic “puny human” jokes, threatening to smash everyone if they don’t laugh.

The salad course is served, so it’s time to catch up with the plot. The mystery villain has placed a “hypno-disc” inside Sue’s salad, and uses it to mesmerize her. She renders the disc harmless by turning it invisible. Then Ben snatches her salad from her and eats it, disc and all.

More standup acts. Power Man and Iron Fist argue with each other rather than crack wise. Sixteen Avengers take the stage for a humorous retelling of the FF’s origins. Thor is next, making Ben the butt of a bunch of bald jokes. After that is the Watcher and the Silver Surfer, who riff about alternate reality versions of the FF, only for the Watcher to nauseous after the Surfer flies circles around him. Daredevil shows up, complete with shadowy Frank Miller-like art, to talk about how much insurance companies hate the FF. The X-Men flat-out attack the FF, only to claim they’re being mind-controlled by Magneto (who doesn’t have mind control powers). Dr. Strange is next, and his speech is so boring and long-winded that Eternity itself shows up to drag him off the stage.

Time for the main course, Cornish game hens. Except the mystery villain has snuck a tiny machine gun into Reed’s hen. His elasticity absorbs the tiny bullets, and he spits them out like watermelon seeds. Ghost Rider enters, using his hellfire to roast not the FF, but their dinners. Black Bolt, with Medusa’s help, says he can sense someone is trying to destroy the FF. Several of the heroes pledge to help if needed.

Dessert is served, and Ben’s ice cream grows into a giant ice cream monster. His punches pass right through the monster, so Reed hands Ben a spoon. With an “It’s slobberin’ time!” Ben eats the entire monster. He then deduces that only Dr. Doom could be behind the attacks. Doom shows up in person, exclaiming “Wrong, camel breath!” Doom explains that he might have been a fun guy if he’d never meet Reed Richards.

Reed then sees a mysterious figure throw a switch backstage, and there’s a two-page spread of all the heroes leaping into action. (This is actually a collage of promotional images of the Marvel characters, but whatever.) The mystery villain is… Willie Lumpkin, the FF’s mailman. He explains that he found an undelivered package with the FF’s address in the post office basement. He tripped and accidentally opened it, revealing a device called the Brain-Skull. It turned Willie into a genius, but also evil. Reed says this was a backup invention of his to fall back on in case the FF’s origin spaceflight didn’t pan out. Reed safely dismantles the Brain-Skull and says the real enemy here is the U.S. Postal Service.

We follow this up with quick one-panel-each rapid fire jokes from Wyatt Wingfoot, Agatha Harkness, Crystal, Quicksilver, Moon Knight, She-Hulk, Spider-Woman, Ant-Man, Howard the Duck, Man-Thing, Thundra, Tigra, Dazzler, Brother Voodoo, Impossible Man, the original Guardians of the Galaxy, and, strangest of all, Spider-Man’s Aunt May with the cosmic power of Captain Universe.

Then comes the time in the evening where the guest of honor gets to turn the tables and roast the roasters. Johnny threatens to give everyone a hotfoot and Reed says he doesn’t mind the jokes because he’s… willing to be flexible. Sue announces that after this night, she should have her own battle cry like “Flame on” or “It’s clobberin’ time,” so she turns invisible with a cry of “Fade out!” Ben gets the final word with a bunch of puns ending with “Things for the memories.”

Out in the audience, Black Bolt loses it and laughs out loud upon hearing “Things for the memories.” His earth-shattering voice destroys the entire room. Amid the rubble, the heroes all leave while Hembeck keeps making jokes. Ben gets the final word again, saying “At least the food was good.”

The inside back cover features Hembeck sharing some of his favorite funny FF moments, and dedicating the issue to FF creators Stan Lee and Jack Kirby.

Unstable molecule: Reed says his rubbery powers are what keeps him young-looking, despite he and Captain America being two of the oldest superheroes.

Fade out: Yes, this is where I get the “Fade out” quote from Sue for this blog. It never took off as a catch phrase for her, though. Maybe someday.

Clobberin’ time: Upon arriving at the Plaza Hotel, Ben gives a lousy tip to a taxi driver, which was a running gag in the FF’s regular comic, again making this parody feel like we’re still in the Marvel Universe.

Flame on: This is the only time I know of that Johnny burns something inside his mouth. The great fan question of whether he breathe fire like a dragon continues to go unanswered.

Fantastic fifth wheel: The comic is quick to point out that Crystal, Medusa, Power Man, and even Tigra and Impossible Man were all former members of the FF. Frankie Raye is also mentioned at one point, and she appears on the cover.

Four and a half: Franklin doesn’t attend the roast because he’s at home with a cold, where Alicia is babysitting. He says he’d rather watch the Three Stooges than his parents on TV.

Commercial break: This wacky parody comic got the deluxe treatment — 30 pages with no ads!

Trivia time: Is this canon or isn’t it? The Marvel Wiki states that Fantastic Four Roast takes place in an alternate universe dubbed the “Hembeck-verse,” where all Marvel characters are aware they are comic book characters and can break the fourth wall. The wiki states that The Fantastic Four Roast is the only appearance of the Hembeck-verse. But then you click on the entries for Fred Hembeck Destroys the Marvel Universe and Fred Hembeck Sells the Marvel Universe, and those also list the Hembeck-verse as a location. The wiki editors need to sort out this complex Hembeck continuity, it seems.

Trivia time: The Fantastic Four Roast is a must-read for FF fans. The actual jokes might be embarrassingly bad, but what makes it work is how everyone is written in character. The creators sat down and worked out how each Marvel hero would actually do standup comedy. Also, there’s an actual plot with actual life-or-death stakes, something often skipped in superhero parodies. It’s silly and stupid, but also an important piece of Marvel history if there ever was one.

Next: Galactic town.

****

Want more? Check out my book, CINE HIGH, now available for the Kindle and the free Kindle app.

Reading the Fantastic Four comics from the start. This is issue #5 of Heroes Reborn: Fantastic Four (a.k.a. volume 2, issue 5), courtesy of superstar artist Jim Lee. We can’t reboot the Fantastic Four without also rebooting Dr. Doom, right?

Recap: Reed and Sue traveled to Wakanda to investigate the space anomaly that gave the FF their powers, only to be abducted by Dr. Doom. We begin with the previous issue’s other cliffhanger, where a mysterious man snuck into the Baxter Building. Ben and Johnny confront him, only to reveal that it’s… Wyatt Wingfoot! Ben and Johnny are ready for a fight, but Wyatt insists that the “Wyatt Wingfoot” who sabotaged the FF back in issue #1 was an imposter.

Wyatt explains that he was on assignment for S.H.I.E.L.D. in Eastern Europe investigation some hacking into the FF’s original spaceflight. He was betrayed by his own people and locked up, only to escape and make it to New York as a fugitive, seeking Reed’s help. Ben tries to contact Wakanda only to get a message that Reed and Sue are unavailable. Wyatt assumes the worst and says it’s up to the three of them to save Reed and Sue.

Cut to Latveria, where Dr. Doom introduces himself to captives, Reed, Sue, and Black Panther. “After all these years, we finally meet,” Doom says. Reed says he knows who Doom used to be, back when he was grad school student Victor Von Doom. In grad school, Reed and Doom ran in the same circle of genius friends, which also included Tony Stark, Bruce Banner, and Henry Pym. In grad school, Doom tested his design for a new mech suit in hopes of conquering Latveria. The suit blew up in his face, horribly scarring him. After leaving school and hiding out in Tibet to heal, Doom eventually take over Latveria, ruling it as a feared dictator.

Doom says both he and the FF are seeking the same mysterious object that emerged from the space anomaly in issue #1. He reveals that he has it — and it’s the Silver Surfer. Well, he’s not called that yet in this continuity. In this introduction scene, he’s just “humanoid.” Doom is attempting to syphon cosmic energy from the Surfer. When a scientist says they’ve hit a delay in the process, Doom kills the man right then and there. Doom then says that Reed will analyze the Surfer’s the powers. If Reed won’t comply, Doom will kill Sue.

Sue won’t have this, using her force fields to fight back. She, Reed, and Black Panther fight Doom’s robot guards, but they’re no match for Doom, who knocks Reed and Sue unconscious with energy blasts. Black Panther, however, escapes into Castle Doom’s ventilation system. Doom orders Wyatt Wingfoot to search for him. One of Wyatt’s cronies refers to him as “Kl’rt,” suggesting that this is the imposter. Later, Reed awakens to find Doom has rigged a still-unconscious Sue to a deathtrap-like device. Defeated, Reed says he’ll help Doom.

Johnny, Ben and the real Wyatt enter Latverian airspace flying an ECM (short for “electronic counter measure,” which I’m not sure is a type of aircraft), following Reed and Sue’s trail. They encounter a hologram of Dr. Doom, telling them “resistance is futile,” and then more robots attack. Wyatt says these are Doom’s “war-bots” and they are programmed with advanced combat skills. They’re no match for Ben and Johnny’s powers. Wyatt leads the two heroes into a nearby sewer drain.

More war-bots attack, and the heroes this time are rescued at the last minute by Black Panther. Once they escape, the imposter Kl’rt shows up and destroys the war-bots, saying the Fantastic Four’s survival is essential to his plan. He says he’s also planning on deactivating all of Dr. Doom’s defenses, leaving him vulnerable to attack.

In Castle Doom, Reed has invented a “flux inhibitor” that Doom can use to absorb the Surfer’s cosmic power. Before he and Doom can properly test the device, Reed, Johnny and Black Panther smash into the room. Everyone fights, while Reed frees Sue from the deathtrap. Then the imposter Kl’rt grabs hold of the flux inhibitor, absorbing the powers in place of Doom. Then he reveals to everyone that he’s not Wyatt Wingfoot, but Kl,rt, warrior of the Galactic Skrull Empire. Doom is ready for a fight, but Kl,rt says he’s already evolved from a Skrull into a Super-Skrull.

To be continued!

Unstable molecule: Dr. Doom initially offers Reed the first chance to absorb the Silver Surfer’s power. When Reed accepts, Doom stops him, saying this was only a test of Reed’s faith. What is this scene even about?

Fade out: Sue wears a white lab coat throughout the issue, perhaps to emphasize her a science-adventure and not just a damsel in distress (which she pretty much is in this one).

Clobberin’ time: I know it’s a cliché to point out stuff like this, but what are those tiny pouches on Ben’s belt? How can he even open them with his giant rock-monster hands?

Flame on: Johnny using his flame to burn off Wyatt’s homeless man beard is an intentional shout-out to the original Fantastic Four #4, when Johnny did that when he met Namor the Sub-Mariner. Also, Wyatt naps on the flight to Latveria, a shout-out to Wyatt napping in the Fantasticar in issue #52.

Commercial break: I love that the release date is “ahead.”

Trivia time: The other guy in the flashback alongside Reed, Doom, Tony Stark, Bruce Banner, and Hank Pym is Rebel O’Reilly. Rebel is a new character created for Heroes Reborn: Iron Man who became a villain. He wore the Promethean armor, but was never called “The Promethean” as his villain name. When Tony Stark returns to the regular Marvel Universe, Rebel became a good guy and took over as Iron Man in the Heroes Reborn universe.

Fantastic or frightful? Once again, this is almost too much plot for one comic book. We’re retelling Dr. Doom’s origin, we’re paying off plotlines set up in the first issue, it’s a Black Panther team-up, and we’re introducing yet another new villain. None of these important events are given any breathing room, and it all still feels like a straightforward remake rather than any sort of creative reimagining.

Next: Galactic town.

****

Want more? Check out my book, CINE HIGH, now available for the Kindle and the free Kindle app.